Keeping your new year’s resolutions all year round is possible. Here’s how.
Photos Rachelle Simoneau
Words Horace's Team
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Experts clue us in.
When we see the new year is approaching, we each tend to have the same reaction, which is having the desire for changes that we believe will help us be more successful during the next 12 months.
So, by January 1, a majority of us will have made at least one new year's resolution, whether it’s declared in public or simply shared with our friends and family in the confines of our own home. But by the time January 17 rolls around, it’s already looking like most of us won’t be able to deliver on these resolutions. This date can be summed up as the fateful moment when many of us will end our efforts, whether it’s quitting smoking, drinking less, going vegan, running more, or following an extensive skincare routine. When you think about it like that, you might decide that this annual tradition is almost ridiculous. The more you try to change, the more things stay the same…in less than three weeks’ time.
But why does this keep happening? And above all, how can we make resolutions that we can actually stick to? We spoke to Ian Taylor, a psychologist and senior lecturer at Loughborough University in the UK to understand why it's so difficult to make lasting resolutions. Additionally, coach Jonty Rooke gave us his personal advice for making resolutions that will last.
Slow and steady wins the race
"Contrary to what you might imagine, good resolutions aren’t often thought out," says Taylor. "For example, is it really smart to decide to take up running during the coldest, darkest months of the year? You shouldn’t rush into resolutions. Instead, you have to start little by little.” Taylor goes on to explain that psychologically, we all need "little wins in the early stages that help with building confidence and a solid routine." For example, if your resolution is to get back in shape, start with simply walking more often, or with short sessions of jogging rather than immediately trying to break a marathon speed record.”
The myth of motivation
Keeping the same psychological point of view in mind, Taylor urges us not to leave our new year goals to our own will. This (coupled with our unfortunate tendency to overestimate the power of our own motivation) is a major reason why new year's resolutions only last for a few weeks.
A high level of motivation is never guaranteed in the long-term. Even the most motivated people have difficulties.
"People think that their willpower alone will help them progress and reach their new goals," shares Taylor. “Unfortunately, motivation is too fragile to rely on it solely. It's important to be able to depend on our self discipline once in a while, but relying on it all the time would be a big mistake."
Find the deeper why
According to Jonty Rooke, a life coach in London, the first step to making better resolutions is understanding the deeper motivation behind them. “As a coach, I try to find the goal behind the goal,” he explains. “If you’re serious about sticking to your resolutions, then you’ll need to analyze and understand the real intentions that drive you to make them.”
“Maybe your resolution is to hit the gym twice a week. But you have to understand that this resolution is linked to another goal, that of feeling better about yourself or having more confidence in yourself,” explains Rooke. "Once you've made a list of your good resolutions, force yourself to take it one step further by asking yourself why you picked these resolutions for the coming year." Understanding what motivates you will increase your chances of keeping your promises to yourself.”
Practice makes perfect
“Human beings are inherently creatures of habit. So anything that’s familiar and compatible with their everyday routine is much more likely to secure results,” shares Rooke. To put it simply, any new routine is difficult to adopt, especially in January, with its freezing weather and lack of sunshine.
"In this situation, the key to success is substitution," advises Rooke. "Trying to end a bad habit abruptly is a decision your brain will struggle with, regardless of how bad the habit may be. Instead, find something better to replace your habit. For example, when my cousin decided to quit smoking, he started to eat an apple every time he wanted a cigarette, and it worked! "
Be realistic
Rooke also explains that the resolutions that are most likely to be successful are those that are most aligned with our values and our motivations: "It’s definitely commendable to want to focus on your work or career, but if your deepest personal values are mostly centered around family life, then chances are this resolution won't work for you. You may subconsciously sabotage your own efforts because your brain naturally associates the fact of working more with a reduction in the time devoted to family activities.”
Don't lose sight of your end goal
Rooke also gave us some tips on how to increase the chances of these resolutions being achieved. “Goals that are written down, shared with someone, and properly prepared for are more likely to be accomplished,” he explains. "When you communicate your goal to someone you value, you’re increasing the likelihood that you’ll stick to your resolution for fear of disappointing that person. For some people, social pressure is all the motivation they need.”
Step by step
To sum it all up, Rooke also recommends breaking each new resolution down into smaller steps that are more simple and actionable. “It's obviously important to have long-term goals like running a marathon, but it's actually all the weekly training sessions that will have the biggest impact both on that goal and in your life. It doesn't matter whether you end up running the marathon or not, you’re still forming healthy habits.” For example, telling yourself that using your Purifying Facial Cleanser and applying a moisturizer are essential to your morning routine for healthier skin. Now you’re armed with the knowledge you need to start your year on a roll.